Category: Faith & Self Care

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Battle of Motherhood christian mom Faith & Self Care

#OwnYourBodBabe on May 13

I am participating in this years #OwnYourBod on May 13th and I want you to join me. There is something that has been irking me since my birthday and today I’m going to tell you what and why?

So, on your Birthday Facebook lets your social media know it’s your big day and people comment, post pictures, videos. It’s awesome you feel celebrated and loved. Well, I try to give people the same respect as they give me and respond to each and every comment I receive. (I know crazy) Anyways, I read every comment.

Well, my last birthday there was a comment that hit me in the gut.  Now, maybe I was taking it wrong but it went a little something like this:

“Happy Birthday to someone who has worked so hard to make their body look good!”

Did you feel the blow to the throat?

The greater hurt was that I see this person every Sunday when I go to Church. Alright, now you are feeling me?

 

My Intended Message

In the last four years, it has never been my intention to promote a perfect body. I have admitted that I am vain and that my weight loss journey began because I wanted to get skinny. But, that changed during the process and it became an authentic passion to help other people honor their temple and transition into a healthy lifestyle.  

The results of moving your body and fueling it properly is that not only you look good but you feel good. That is what I have worked so hard on is showing others that a healthy lifestyle is possible and the results are that I look good.  

I also have become more confident and aware of who I am and proud of the achievement that I have made and my goal is no longer to be skinny but I really wouldn’t mind being the strongest woman in the world.

Owning my Body

So, today I chose to Own this strong body and say, “Yes, I look good and I have worked hard.” If that inspires someone to respect their body and treat it the way God intended then I’ll take that throat punch of others passive aggressive opinion.  I am on a mission to serve others by helping them find and live a healthier lifestyle. Earlier this month, a Facebook Memory popped up that I did a year ago with ReadersDigest.com. Sharing the message that EVERYbody is a bikini body.  

We really need to stop comparing ourselves to filters and being the best of who we can be.  Again, I am being bold and stepping up I am also joining an inspiring Influencer that I met last year at the life-changing Well Summit.  I have grown so much from the things I learned at the Well Summit as well as the connections that I made. Amanda from  Prim and Propah

 

#OwnYourBodBabe Vision

Amanda invited me to share this message today.  Amanda shared the vision also came from her own vain reasons:

“I started #OwnYourBodBabe because simply put, I wanted to wear a shirt that was cropped. Pretty superficial, right? But as I started coming to terms with the ingrained yuck surrounding my own self-image, I began to realize that this sh!t was going to take some work. I plan to talk about the hard work it takes to really commit to self-love/appreciation/acceptance and some days just dealing with the funk.”

“OwnYourBodBabe intent is to open up a conversation “ to encourage ourselves and others to appreciate and love our bodies, not to be dragged down by ugly societal pressures and the urge to try to be something we are not.”

Sports Bra & Capri Leggings gifted from Handful Bra

 

Share the Message

Today on Facebook, Twitter and specifically Instagram join us in by following the hashtag  #OwnYourBodBabe and be inspired and encouraged by other women to love your body. Then other people’s opinion won’t matter.  Now if you aren’t comfortable posting which is understandable there is another way that you can participate. Amanda created these questions for you to take some time today to ask yourself:

  • “Why do I give myself a hard time?”
  • “What causes me to feel self-conscious?”
  • “Why do I hate my ‘insert perceived flaw here’?”

Answering these questions can help you to start discovering and appreciating your body for how amazing it is versus your physical appearance.  That is the beginning of transformation and that is exactly what I have worked so hard for and hope I impress on others to achieve.

Conquer you #OwnYourBodBabe Monday, Beauties!

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Battle of Motherhood christian mom Faith & Self Care Fitness and Health

Reasons why I have Fit Mom Guilt

I know it’s probably not just me. Before I was a Mom, I seldom felt guilty for my actions or reflective on my behavior. Since becoming a Mom, anything and everything I do causes me guilt. I am not sure why I hold myself to a higher standard than I do other Mom’s, but I am always questioning my motherhood skills.  From the moment I wake up until the moment I go to bed. I am thinking the who, what, when, why and how that involves my three daughters’ day.

The majority of my day is making sure that their needs are met; physically, socially and academically.  I am constantly outnumbered.  I have found solace in the gym to help me get through the day.  Even though I know my gym time does not affect them because I am usually at the gym while they sleep. I feel guilty about not being there if they wake up. Crazy right? I have a whole list of my crazy guilt for being a fit mom.

There are so many things that make me feel guilty about living a healthier lifestyle.  It seems odd, but you have to admit that eating healthy, exercising regularly and taking care of your body is not the norm. So, for those who choose to live that life, it may be hard when everyone around them is not. Sometimes I feel guilty that I have made it a priority to honor my temple.  I always feel the need to explain my choices. Good and bad!

So, I am putting them out there all the things that I feel guilty about living this healthy lifestyle and being a Mom of three daughters. I am sure there are others who feel the same.

1. Spending time away to exercise.

This has always been a guilt trigger for me until we joined our new gym.  I would either work out very late at night after the girls went to bed or now very early before they rise so that I won’t miss time with them to go to the gym.  For my older daughters, this is important because they have extracurricular activities, friends and commitments. Not only is it nearly impossible once they wake up to find time to go to the gym. We spend a lot of time in the car going here and there. Until our new gym, I had to get up at the crack of dawn or in the late night.

Since a new gym opened up in my area that has a Kid’s gym included. As long as I can make time during there hours. I can go to the gym while they are awake.  They enjoy their time, and they are active while I sweat it out too.  It’s a great way to eliminate my guilt of spending time away to exercise.

2. Eating healthier versions of dinner.

I have tried intentionally always to eat the same or a version of dinner. I have guilt that my girls will remember me eating out of pre-prepped containers. Sometimes I have to eat differently because of my food allergies and sensitivities. I also feel guilty when we eat out, and I have to make a special request because of my food issues. Regardless, if I were fit mom or not I would have to order differently, but I still feel guilty. The only difference in my meals is usually because of my food allergies and sensitivities. Although created differently I try to make a dairy free, gluten free version of the same thing. Mostly, I make one meal and we eat together because of my fit mom guilt.

3. Eliminating or restricting foods that used to be permitted.

I have recently, become a sugar cop.  This year I have become convicted to remove sugar from my home. My revolt against sugar does not stem from me being a Fit Mom.  My decision to get rid of sugar in my house is because of the adverse effects of sugar. My family has a significant sugar dependency including myself.  

Sugar is tough to avoid especially when your kids are in public school.  I find there are ways to get your sweets without sugar.  I am trying to make that change in my home. I have guilt because although I know, it’s for my families health. Would it be a concern if I wasn’t a fit mom? Those are some of the things that I struggle with when making decisions for my family.  

4. Looking like a Fitness Model and trying to be a role model.

When I began my fitness journey, I admired women who looked like I do now but never thought that would be me.  Although, I look like a fitness model in a tank top. When I was up every day, I am a Mom to three very impressionable girls. I don’t walk around flexing or taking belfies in my full-length mirror in my Sports Bra because it’s not about that.  The way I look on the outside is because of what I do and put in my inside. I don’t ever want my daughters to strive to look a certain way to reflect a particular image. So, I have guilt for the way that I look although, it’s just a result of my lifestyle change.

5. Prioritizing health over idle time.

I have high anxiety, and when idle I find I get anxious  I like to exercise to get rid of extra energy as well as Workout and Worship.  I seldom have idle time now that my girls are older. In the past, I would fill my idle time with snacks and tv time. Now I fill that time with movement and doing things with my children.

I do feel guilty that we are always active. I need to practice balance give us time to sit idle as well as move.  Although I am showing my girls alternatives to mindless behavior. I feel we all could use a good tv show binge from time to time.  I am trying not to feel so guilty and to start practicing and showing balance.

 

6. Setting a Standard of good health

Because I am a Fitness Professional, I feel obligated to walk the walk.  I know as a Mom this may be setting a very high standard for good health. I don’t want my daughters to feel that they need to workout 5 to 6 times a week, but I do want them to be active at least 150 minutes a week.  I have guilt on what they see that I don’t realize. They are creating their standards, and I am giving them the example. Ultimately, I want my girls to honor their temple whatever that looks like to them and not what they see of me.  

7. Balancing life and living a healthy lifestyle and not a diet.

Because I am in the health and fitness field, my passion is to learn.  I am always exploring different aspects of wellness and a healthy lifestyle.  Typically, I am not a trend or fad jumper. I do like to research and try things for myself. Sometimes my children get included in the experiment as well. I am sure they will have plenty to share with their therapist about their Health Nut Mom.  Like the year she went crazy and took away sugar. I will probably still feel Mom guilt.

Living a healthy lifestyle isn’t something that I should feel guilty about, but I do.  I think if I weren’t living a healthy lifestyle I would feel guilty as well. I guess it goes with the Mom territory but if I could instill anything in my daughters: It would be to honor their temple; From top to bottom. Educate yourself, devote to God and Scripture, Feed yourself good food and move your body every day.  As long as they get those foundations, I think all my Fit Mom Guilt was not all in vain.

Do you get Mom Guilt? About what?

 

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christian mom Faith & Self Care

Gluten Free and Allergy Friendly Expo 2018

Why is Gluten Free not a diet for me?

Do I get asked what diet do you follow?  If you look at what I ate and wanted to classify it as a diet it could be considered paleo, keto or Mediterranean but one thing that it will not include is gluten and dairy.  Over this weight loss journey and as I shared along the way a few years ago, I discovered that I had a wheat allergy. Since eliminating wheat from my life, I have found so many positive benefits.  All my life I have had hyperpigmentation and bad skin. No longer I have a healthy glow. I also had to remove wheat from my skincare products.

A Wheat Allergy Diagnosis

I have also suffered from digestive issues such as constipation, leaky gut, and extreme bloating and gas.  My now flat tummy is not only from diligent work but from eliminating wheat in my diet.

Gluten Free and Allergy Friendly Expo

Initially, it was so daunting trying to find products that were gluten-free, tasty and didn’t have a lot of other extra ingredients.  Just because it is gluten-free doesn’t mean it’s healthy. When I went to my first Gluten Free and Allergy Friendly Expo three years ago. It was an excellent opportunity to see all the products that are available to try, see, read ingredients labels. If you are unsure of your food allergies, they have testing available.

 

Other Wellness Products

Last year, I also got to experience other Wellness Products such that helped remove toxins, metals and other adverse things that we accumulate from our lifestyle.  I was able to check out some cool skincare and makeup brands that were wheat free. Was educated at almost every vendor table and the event empowered me to make a living a gluten-free lifestyle and smoother transition.  

The innovation of Allergy Friendly Products

I look forward to it now every year where I get to discover new products, services, and organizations that are revolutionizing food allergies for everyone. Also, because of these products, there are a lot more options that there were years ago.  As companies which are usually founded because of their children or their own food allergies discoveries. You will get to meet innovative people who wouldn’t accept food allergies for what they were and set out to create better products for those afflicted.  

Family Event

The Gluten Free and Allergy Friendly expo is a great family event.  If you are looking for other food alternatives, trying to change your own diet like I was at one point in time or just looking to see what innovations and creations in the food industry. I would highly recommend attending.  

Since completely eliminating Gluten from my diet I feel 100% better and never thought that my allergies could be remedied easily. I am so glad that I have the Gluten Free and Allergy Free Expo to keep me updated on the best products that are out there for me.

Join Me at the Expo

If you want to attend this year, it will be held in the same location as previous years.  

October 13-14, 2018
10:00 am – 3:00 pm on Saturday the 13th
10:00 am – 3:00 pm on Sunday the 14th
Meadowlands Exposition Center
355 Plaza Drive
Secaucus, NJ 07094
Click HERE for directions.
Click HERE for a map.

Parking is free.

The use of strollers, carts or wagons is prohibited except as needed for transporting children or medical equipment.

Call the venue at 201-330-7773
It’s also not too late to grab tickets you can get them here: 
USE PROMO CODE: “ADVANCE” for 20% off until 10/13
I hope you can come! Do you have a food allergy and how have you been able to find products to help make life easier?
I am a Gluten Free and Allergy Friendly Influencer. I received free tickets and tickets for giveaway in exchange for promotion and coverage of the event.  All my opinions are mine and my affiliation did not affect my statements My Full Disclosure Policy 
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christian mom christianity Faith & Self Care Faith Journey faithfueled friday

I just want to “Say Thanks”

Declaring Gratitude

I declared my word for 2018 as gratitude, and I knew that it would be  challenged the moment I pressed “share.”

Here I am again reflecting. Ever since December, I’m not going to lie this girl’s mental strength has been on a 4 or 5 out of 10.  Anxiety has crept its way back into my life, and it’s only because I’ve been allowing myself to rely on myself. Old habits die hard, and I am five months into my recovery from my ankle injury. I am at another commonplace in my faith journey and through the seasons.

Bad Habits Die Hard

Yep, I have been running on my own but unlike in the past. I KNOW better and know that relying on my own strength, know-how and provision will last for a moment. God has shown me some amazing things in my life when I give them to Him!

I also have too much going on; Way too much and when your “still” (whether intended or forced by an ankle injury) like in my case. It becomes pleasantly clear.

To say God hadn’t warned me would also be a lie. I knew what I was doing it as I am very capable of saying, “No.”  When God would say “slow down.” I’d say, “okay, just after this one thing.”

When God said, “Ask me?” I’d say, “Sure but let me see if this works first” and here I am ending the first quarter of 2018. Spent, warn, lost and like the knucklehead I can be; finally listening.

Different Reaction

This time it’s different. I am no longer like; “Why me?” I have yet to say that but before that would have been my first go-to. Although, I fell back into old habits. One thing that has changed is my strength in the Lord. I am lost, but I am lost in the right direction. I know the burden is too great so I know I must give it to God. Even though I was disobedient, God did not turn His back on me but persistently reminded me to lean on Him.  I also am now fully aware and have experienced an unconditionally loving Father who will never leave nor forsake me. I can turn to Him anytime and seek His grace, mercy, love and guidance. I will continue to grow. God will continue to prune me.

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deut 31:6

Why am I confessing?

I felt really led to share because I am not a perfect Christian. I am one of those who knows that my sinful nature will always take over my second nature to be obedient to God.

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV

That I too struggle with my faith walk. I think its great to see the highlight reel of life. To see how good it could be but let’s not forget and live in reality. We all struggle that’s why we need God, and we are also supposed to hold each other accountable.

“Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, so that you too will not be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ.” Galatians 6:1-2 NASB

You can’t hold someone accountable if they don’t tell you.  It’s also an opportunity to help someone else grow or relate. The facade of perfection has to stop. Because what are we genuinely seeking? Unless it’s to be more like Jesus, it is all in vain.

Plank Challenge?

So, I am giving all the things to Jesus second quarter and seeing where that takes me. I am going to give it my best try. I’ve done it in the past and it He has always surpassed my expectations or anything that I could have done on my own.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matt 11:28

Working on a Grateful Mindset

I am also doing a Challenge in April! I am beginning Easter Sunday and through the entire month of April!

Each day I will be planking for 60 seconds and saying “Thank you, God!” For the little and the big things.  Each day while planking I will be reciting or meditating Scripture!  

I want to invite you to join me? There is nothing to gain but a grateful perspective.

We did a plank “talk” challenge in Bibles and Bootcamps. Most of the women chose to meditate and recite their favorite scripture.  All were shocked at how much longer they held the plank with scripture. We call them “Power Verse” in #BaB.

One day I was thinking how amazing it would be to see women expressing gratitude to God; then planking came to mind-not because it rhymes with Thanks.  I just thought of my Beauties and how powerful it would be to see people praising God and thanking Him while planking.

Will you join me?

Join my event on Facebook and hopefully join a month of Praise and Thanks as we end our first quarter! Even if you do it privately on your own, I have some verses for you to use in your meditation.  If you do want to join me merely post on whatever Social Media platform you like (I will be on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter) and use and follow the hashtag #TYGod

Can you be grateful even with a little bit?

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Disconnected Community

I haven’t done a FaithFueled™ Friday in a long time it’s been so busy with school that writing is the last thing I want to do lately.  After a phone call with my friend I had to dust off the keyboard and share my thoughts. The other day I was speaking to a friend who just moved to a new state. She is having a hard time making new friends and thought the Church that her family decided to attend would be a great place to look.

The other day I was speaking to a friend who just moved to a new state. She is having a hard time making new friends and thought the Church that her family decided to attend would be a great place to look.

Why wouldn’t she believe that people of the same beliefs would want to fellowship?

She has been there for a few months and has made lots of effort to be apart of the Church community only to find there is no such thing as Church community at her Church at least not how we would have it defined.

“No one hangs out with anyone at Church they come on Sunday’s to worship and then go about their lives,” After she said that; it made me think my Church is very similar. We worship together on Sunday and then don’t check in until the following Sunday unless you’re in Bible Study. It’s kind of like out of sight out of mind which isn’t a real relationship but more of an acquaintance. We know very little about the people we worship with other than surface things. There is no longer that sense of community that the Church once brought to families and towns.

I have been attending my Church for four years and have only been invited to three families homes outside of a Church function; (and I include a Direct Sales party) if not, it would only be two invites in four years, and that’s just sad. Or is it? Is this commonplace? When did the Church stop being a place for believers to fellowship and do a life and a place to just check in every Sunday?

“Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.” Acts 2:46-47

The church isn’t what it used to be!

In Biblical days churches, temples and synagogues were the epicenters for most towns. It’s where the taxes were collected, food was given, functions were held, and people gathered together daily to fellowship. Your Church family was like your extended family and the fellowship didn’t end on Sunday you saw these people in your life on a daily basis.

The Church is no longer an integral role in society. It’s not a place where people come to every day but usually on the day of worship. Then we go off to our own lives, friends, and families. The bonds that we uniquely share in our love for Jesus and place of worship is where it ends.

Check in at Church

Now, I have to be fair in the four years that I have been at my Church I have not done my due diligence to grow and foster relationships. In the first two years as I attended my Church I would reach out often. I had IF gatherings in my home, bible study walks. I tried everything to find some Christian friends and invite them to my home. The experiences were great but never really made connections; not long lasting.

Why? We have lives outside of our Church Identity. In our busy society, most of us are too busy for friends much less to deal with people in our Church that we barely know. We get caught up so much in our things to do that we don’t reach out to connect with each other. Not just at Church but in all of the society.

This is another way for the enemy to attack he makes us think that the people at the Church are wrong and we don’t need the Church for our salvation. We do! We need the accountability, reminders, and direction. People can be judgemental, but if you “don’t have any sinners who attend your Church, you may want to find a new Church.” That is why we are their for our redemption we are not perfect we are people we all have our struggles. Jesus loves us all the same and wants us to be together in His kingdom one day.

I can no longer justify other peoples actions affecting my church attendance. I don’t attend my Church for the weekly check-in but to get some time to praise, worship and honor God. Although, I don’t feel community there I still attend because of the Message. Recently, God has been pricking my heart on this subject I can’t continue to be like others and not followup. It’s one of those situations it’s never the job it’s always the people. There will always be people but if you expect people to treat you like you’d treat yourself you’re going to be disappointed. You must show grace to fellow members and even sometimes mercy.

Above everything, love one another earnestly, because love covers over many sins.

1 Peter 4:8

A lonely society

We are living in a lonely world. We can be surrounded by people but disengaged on our phone. We can stand in a crowd but feel utterly alone because we as a society are isolating ourselves. Filling our time with things to do instead of meaningless relationships when we are all seeking a meaningful relationship. We were meant to be with each other, lead each other, teach each other and do life together. The sad part is most of us feel alone yet we won’t reach out to each other to fill the loneliness.

“I appeal to you, brothers and sisters, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another in what you say and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly united in mind and thought.”

1 Corinthians 1:10

Disconnected Community
It’s also apparent with the amount of time spent on Social media to fill our need for relationships. I am very guilty of that after I went to countless Bible studies, events, and opportunities to fellowship. I would leave each time knowing that the connection ended there so, I went to the internet.

Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.
Romans 12:16

Need more than a Virtual Relationship

I am intentionally (and unintentionally) in lots of Facebook groups for all of my interest with the common motivator for joining is to connect with like-minded people. I have also been in Virtual Bible Studies, Mentorships, Accountability Groups and we all were there for the same thing companionship but if you were to get us in a room together not one of us would exchange numbers. Or, actually, follow up to get to know the person better.

I feel we are all living surface lives just doing enough to touch the surface never really getting to know someone. If we did if we followed up with connections, made phone calls and not text or emails. Sat down in person one on one and got to know somebody we may find that best friend that we crave.

So, what is keeping us from continuing these connections?

Get Up and Do Something

Effort and energy we have become such a lazy society that we don’t want the work of building and maintaining relationships we want surface friends. You can log on and log off when you want. You can only share the good and never the bad. There is no threat of if they’ll like you for who you are because you give them the who they want to see. The same goes for Church you show up dressed nice, proclaim your hallelujahs, make small chat before and after church and never follow up. Never put the extra effort or work it takes to create a community.

“For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ, we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.”
Romans 12:4-5

Why not start now?

We need to unite people and not just over what hot political topic there is but we need to unite amongst ourselves if we are going to be God’s army. The enemy wants us to live separate, be surface and vain. He is trying to make us think “we’re connected” through our disconnected online relationship, but we are fooling ourselves. God has told us to fellowship together, sharpen each other and prepare to do battle together.

One day at Church invite someone over for brunch, get to know someone a little better than Sunday chit-chat. Reach out to them for coffee or a park date to learn and possibly grow in Christ together. Behind the screen, connections can be valuable, but we need to be with people in real time and do real life.

Don’t wait for the next Church function to reach out to your brother or sister in Christ. Although, the Church is no longer the epicenter of our life. Christ is, and we need to love each other as Jesus loves us. We need to know each other because we need to be prepared to unite and stand up when called. We must mend the brokenness of our Christian communities and keep the tight-knit and secure. The way we do that? You, start today and reach out to someone in your Church. Let’s start living a life of a real community.

How do you maintain community in your church? Do you find it hard to maintain relationships?

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